School. (very wordy.)

Ugh. I was in denial until a short time ago that I was actually returning to school. I did have a complete emotional breakdown two weeks ago that involved this song and lasted for approximately three hours, BUT, I realized that I'm a grown-up (I have trouble with this concept), put things in perspective, and now I am 99.5% okay.

Since I thought it would be wise to avoid all topics involving my return to work, the childcare of my precious daughters was also put on hold. This COMPLETELY stressed me out two weeks ago when I FINALLY decided to be responsible. The childcare situation we were going to have looked like this:
Monday: unknown babysitter
Tuesday: unknown babysitter
Wednesday: very good friend that I love who has two boys our girls' ages
Thursday: same
Friday: my mom AT OUR HOUSE!!! watching the girls.

I interviewed three babysitters to fill in the "unknown" days. I made a rubric and score sheet before going. (go ahead and laugh.) Perhaps my standards were too high. I wasn't completely thrilled with any of them. (Sidenote:.....I love babysitting....I love being home with my girls, and I love having a little buddy come over for them to play with. BUT, for me...why does a stranger get to spend every moment in her living room with MY children, AND what if this is woman and/or her husband is a closet weirdo and just put on a (mediocre) show for me?!??!?! What if that?!?!?!) I was not having a good time finding someone to fill those days. I was very stressed.

Then, a post card for "Family Day" came in the mail from The Learning Experience. The girls had just eaten lunch and were getting ready for their naps, but I thought...let's check it out...NOW! Since Addy thought the card came just for her, she was game, and I figured it couldn't hurt anything. So we went. I LOVED it. They LOVED it. It was a little more pricey than a babysitter, but this is what I considered:
1. CON-SIS-TEN-CY!!!!!!! (as opposed to 3 different care-givers.)
2. Challenging curriculum. (I was impressed. And I am very critical.)
3. Guaranteed Structure.
4. Lots of friends.
5. (more for Addy on this one:) Addy would be excited about going there..unlike me dropping her off at some one's front door.
6. Even though it costs a little more, we do what we think is best for our children in EVERYTHING we do. Why would we stop when it comes to the most important thing just because we'd save a little. We wouldn't.

So, I was convinced after our visit that they would soon be enrolled in school and became obsessed with making sure it was the best.place.possible. Then the questions started. And kept coming. And coming. I was definitely one of "those parents." I don't care ;) I thought, even though I had a great first impression, it was the only school I had ever toured. I did no research about schools. Oh boy!

I HAVE to make a well-educated decision. Here we go..... yesterday we visited The Goddard School and The Malvern School. Both were great. Both made me comfortable. Both were more expensive than The Learning Experience. After filling out more (Jamie-created) score sheets, I decided that only The Malvern School is better than The Learning Experience. So, the current topics of discussion are the following:

TLE's curriculum has a nice appearance and seems challenging, but, upon further research, I discovered that it comes from their corporate office...which means the teachers do not write their own lesson plans. (not so much an issue for Amy at this point, but definitely an issue for Addison and for Amy within the next year.) Most of their teachers DO NOT have Bachelor's degrees in Early Childhood Education. Some have Associates. Most of certificates of eligibility. A lot of the student population comes from "state-aid." I'm assuming you know what that implies. This is not necessarily a negative quality--- just a little something to consider.

The Malvern School's teachers ALL have Bachelor's degrees in Early Childhood Edu. Their assistants have Associates. They write ALL of their lessons. The "state-aid" issue is not an issue.

So, that is where we are. Big decisions. I feel 1,000% confident that a full-on Early Childhood Education Center is the way for us. I often imagine myself dropping off my babies and going to teach my students. Then, thinking about my babies all.day.long. When I think about these things while they are with a babysitter, I miss them horribly. I feel sick. I want to vomit. I wonder if they are bored. I wonder if they are sad. I wonder if they are watching too much TV.

When I envision myself dropping them off at school, then going to teach my own students, I feel excited for them. That's it! I feel like they are doing more than even I could do with them. I can look at the clock and know what they are doing. I get butterflies when I think about how much they will learn this year. Of course, I am totally biased, but Addison is already super-smart! Lately, she is so interested in the alphabet and reading/writing. Imagine how far she'll be able to go with this!!!! I am completely excited about it.

But now, which school do we choose?!?!?